The last week in the house, and the purging continues. I am pretty much all ready to go now. The house echoes now; it is so empty.
This needs to be done, but I am finding it overwhelming doing this on my own.
Spent a couple of days in Montreal with my wonderful sister, Kerry. A wonderful city, but it was even more wonderful to spend some one on one time with her. It was actually very needed and very cathartic.
We got to the airport, happily tired from a busy and fun weekend, only to find that my flight had been cancelled. A quick call to Westjet and I am on the flight in the morning, a 12 hour wait.
How am I going to spend the next 12 hours trying to pass the time.
So, we walk Kerry to her departure gate, and she is delayed too. There are three red alerts at the airport. Nothing is leaving, although planes are arriving with no where to go. The red alert lifts and they have planes parked all over the place, and are bussing folks to planes that do not have a gate. Kerry finally got on her flight at 2 am - delayed by 6 hours. But she got on, and she got home. That's what matters here.
I got home the next morning, after a no sleep night.
I am still working on whether this move to the trailer is the right move. But the more I do think on it, the more I know that life here is in stasis. It is not moving and it is not going to move. Those whose life I would like to share my life with continues to talk about our life together, but there is no action.
I have waited and waited. For what, to be in the same position as I was three years ago.
I want some passion, some love, some desire. and I am so not getting that at the moment. If that should ever happen to come into my life, I am not going to turn it away on the chance that one of the many promises made come to fruition.
I know this is the right thing, but I still need to tell myself that. The moving out is overwhelming though. I need to work on getting the house ready. So next time that I come back here, it will be as a homeless bum!
No comments:
Post a Comment